Customer Rating: 
Summary: A must read for all!!
Comment: I must admit that this book was sometimes very hard for me to read, because it hit way to close to home. I am a 37 year old black male and I have definitely seen a change in the landscape when it comes to relationships in today's culture. I was brought up overseas and in a home and culture where a man was supposed to treat a woman with respect and dignity, get to know her and know her passions and dreams before taking her to bed. When I came back to the United States in 1994, I realized that I was totally unprepared for the casual nature of sex and the way many women basically treated men as boy-toys who were just there to fulfill a need at that particular time. This is not to say thjat all women are like this, as the book eloquently shows, but most women are totally UNPREPARED and shocked when they do meet someone who shows chivarly and is old fashioned in their values and wants to actually get to know them. It is almost always assumed that to want to know someone is to try and "tie them down" and prevent them from being able to be emotionally free from you at any time. But this is the irony, and "unhooked" tells the story so well, being unhooked does not actually prevent emotional bondage, it actually increases sadness and creates a level of emptiness that surfaces later on.
This is a MUST for all especially if you are concerned about the way sex has become such a casual entity in our society. THere is enough blame to go around and is not simply a matter of "these kids don't have moral". Read the book and be sobered and humbled....
Customer Rating:
Summary: A Must Read
Comment: This book is a must read for everyone, but especially all girls and women. It came recommended to me by a friend and I have sent copies to many friends an family members. Stepp is honest, straightforward, and pragmatic. The girls she interviewed could easily be me and my friends. But to see it written in a book makes the experience real and allows girls and women to take an honest look one of the most important topics in our lives. I can't stress how much I recommend that everyone read this book. Laura Stepp, thank you!
Customer Rating: 
Summary: Young Men Beware!
Comment: I read this book because I have three children - all male - and I wanted to better understand the dating landscape they are now facing as young men. I found the author's approach to writing and research refreshing and easy to read. The message, however, horrified me. My husband and I have tried our best to raise our children to be honorable young men and treat girls/young women with the utmost respect. From listening to my young men talk about the young females their age and from my reading of this book, it's clear to me that young MEN need to be protected from these young females! To be "used" as nothing more than a tool for someone else's sexual gratification is deeply damaging to one's self esteem irrespective of gender. I feel deep compassion for any female "hooking up" because it's clear they are engaged in self-destructive behavior with long-term, perhaps lifelong, consequences to their self esteem and sense of self worth. And why? So they can be more biologically like males? If evolution is what these young females are attempting to alter, good luck, but don't drag well-intended, repectful, loving, young men down with you. This book is a warning shot across the bow for BOTH genders!
Customer Rating:
Summary: A very accurate view on today's young women
Comment: I can't stress enough how accurate a portrayal this book is of most modern young women. As a 28-year old woman who has just finished medical school but never had a lasting relationship because I always felt my studies should come first (and so I've been told all my life), this book hit very close to home.
I always figured it was something wrong with ME. I wasn't able to take a step back and gain broader perspective on the messages that have surrounded me almost from birth. No, I'm not trying to sound like a victim, but it's crucial to know how many seemingly small factors can come together to form a larger problem.
And I know it's not just me... For example, my best friend (who recently got her MBA) was sitting a bar and chatting with this guy she was really interested in, both physically & mentally, for hours. He hinted that she should come back to his apartment with her, but she didn't take the hints (or says she didn't). The next day she came to me, asking, "Why couldn't I just have sex with him??" There is a lot of confusion in young women today... Not only in terms of balancing academic/career/extracurricular goals with personal relationships, but also the pressure to BE overtly sexual and treat men disposably while at the same time really desiring a deeper emotional connection.
I think Stepp is right... Some of us, through a combination of factors, aren't equipped with the tools (due to lack of experience, and being actively influenced away from experience with messages like "There'll be plenty of time to date after is done.") to adequately integrate a loving relationship into our lives. There are quotes in this book, much like the above, that I have heard since early adolescence. There are other lines that I have used almost verbatim as excuses to guys as to why I couldn't have an emotionally vulnerable relationship with them.
I can see how many people will think I'm over-exaggerating. Or how Stepp is overstating either the prevalence of the hooking up culture or the factors that contribute to it. But I promise you, she's not. Of course, what you read won't apply to ALL young women (there are no universalities), but for a great many of us, it's completely accurate. I can't tell you how helpful it's been to me to realize that I'm not alone in this.
Customer Rating:
Summary: Interesting read
Comment: I believe that this is a book that most modern young women will be able to identify with. What must be kept in mind while reading it is that is it not written by a psychologist but rather a journalist. Sessions Stepp does indeed cite journal articles, professionals, and research to supplement her findings thus giving more scientific validity to her own research. It's a worthwhile read whether you're a parent trying to understand your daughter in the context of the hook-up culture or a young woman confused by the hookup culture yourself.
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